First let me say I'm sorry for the long delay in posting on this blog. Life has been very uncooperative as of late but now that things are better I'll resume a regular schedule.
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I'd like to start this article out with a bit about myself. I was saved as a child through the Lord Jesus Christ. My granddad lead me to the Lord and I am thankful that one of the jewels he has in his crown in heaven is there due to his leading me to Jesus. My childhood was chaotic for reasons I will not go into here; suffice it to say the mountains were high and the valleys were very deep. My teenage years were ones I spent out of fellowship with the Lord. My heart was hard and cold. I had a wall of rage that I intentionally fueled. When you stay angry you don't feel much of anything. I left high school but thankfully I had brains enough to get a GED and went through two years of vocational school for computer repair. I continued drifting through life doing my own thing. I Robby West, the independent man, who needed nobody or no thing....because while I knew there was a hole in my heart I ignored it. I heard a still small voice calling out to me when I wasn't shouting my rage to the world.. That voice scared me more than anything. Because it whispered that despite all the things I had done, I was loved. I, who in my fury told Christ I hated Him, was loved by the One who I was running from. I believed that I did not deserve love. I told myself that I would build a better life for myself and that I did not need anyone to help. I would be strong enough to do it all on my own. What a fool I was. It took one mighty event and a few wonderful people to open my eyes and to teach me just how stupid I was and in many ways, still am. First God worked a miracle and through His grace I was able to forgive my mom and dad for things I went through in my childhood. The wall of rage started to crumble. Then, I met a man named Bill who through his life experiences and wisdom was able to guide me through my own life's troubled waters. I doubt he even knew it at the time, but Bill taught me how to have a friend...and how to be one. The bricks started to come down-the wall around my heart was breached. Then I met Kizzy. I'll never know what it is that she saw or even sees in me, but we fell in love and through her God gave me a family. My daughter Courtney will be three in November and my son Thomas just turned one. How the angry son is a father and my own dad is teaching me just how to be a dad, not just a father. Thank you dad. I love you. God also brought a wonderful family into my life. Through them I have learned to walk with Christ and learned just why He never gave up on me even when I had given up on Him. Thank you Pastor Baldwin for teaching me God's Word and for helping me become the man I am today. Thank you Tim and Chris. Especially Tim and Chris. A guy can never ask for better friends or spiritual mentors.
You both make this Christian walk look so easy! And man can y'all sing! Thanks to these awesome people whom God has used as tools the wall of fury around my heart has been breached finally and Jesus has freed me from my sins and my self imposed torments. And I have my mom again. Thank you Jesus. I love you mom. I forgive you. And I forgive myself at long last. I know this is a rambling letter but this is in my heart and I needed to share it. If you are running from Christ, take my advice. Stop. Face Him. Allow Him into your heart. Make him your Savior. Through Christ our chains are broken and made truly free.
